Heading for Steamboat Springs & Cookie Recipe

These really do have a lot in common. T is leaving today and will be gone until the 21st for Steamboat Springs, CO and a few days of snowboarding and cold weather. She is flying with 4 other girls and meeting their friend who goes to college there. This is her first "big adventure", hence the need for the the cookie recipe below. The five of them are driving back from Ft Collins, Co, via Manhattan, Kansas,and eventually will end up in Texas, hence the need for the cookie recipe below. They will be driving in all of this cold, snowy, nasty weather, hence the need for the cookie recipe below.
Off to make cookies for the next 5 days:

Cuervo Christmas Cookies

1 tsp. Baking Soda 4 large eggs
1 cup water 1 cup nuts
1 cup sugar 2 cups dried fruit
1 cup brown sugar 1 bottle Jose Cuervo Tequila
1 tsp. lemon juice 1 cup butter

Sample Tequila to check quality. Take a large bowl, check Tequila again for quality.pour 1 cup and drink.
Turn on the electric mixer, beat 1 cup butter in a large fluffy bowl. Add 1 tsp. of sugar. Beat again.
At this point it is best to make sure that the tequila is still ok, so try another cup just in case.
Turn off the mixer thingy. Break 2 eggs and add to bowl and chuck in the cup of dried fruit.
Pick up fruit off the floor. Mix on the turner. If the fred druit gets stuck in the beaters, just pry loose with a drewscriver.
Sample the Cuervo to check for tonsisticity. Next, sift 2 cups of salt, or something.
Check the Cuervo. Now sift the lemon juice and strain your nuts. Add table. Add a spoon of sugar or somefink.
Whatever you find. Greash the oven. Turn the cake tin 360 degrees and try not to fall over.
Don't forget to beat off the turner.
Finally, throw the bowl out, finish the Cuervo and make sure to put the stove in the dishwasher for cleaning...CHERRY MISTMAS!!!!!